I think all of my years playing Tetris may not have been wasted after all!
I have been called the Master Packer before. In my time in Europe two years ago I took one backpack and one cross-pack as the entirety of my luggage for the whole two weeks. I always put a lot of forethought and planning into how my bags will be filled; what goes on top for easy access and what days I will need to take a few minutes away from sight-seeing to rinse through my delicate’s, so I really am quite a good traveler.
My skills were tested with the addition of a baby, but the Master Packer will not be deterred from her travel!
We got home from St. George/Vegas on Sunday afternoon and the laundry began. Hannah was so petite to start, and hasn’t gained too much since birth, so the Newborn outfits are all that she can wear right now. I’m not prepared to run out and buy dozens of other outfits either because she WILL grow out of them shortly, so a little laundry now and then is a much easier solution. I like the full laundry treatment on my own delicate’s as well, so everyone got a load of laundry done in preparation for our next big trip.
Once the laundry was finished, I laid out everything I thought that we would need for the trip and then I added a couple of shirts, some extra socks, a pair of easy travel silk slippers, and an extra book, and then I began the process of divvying out the items by how quickly we were going to need them. Obviously, a stack of diapers and some extra clothes for each of us were a good idea, along with the toiletries and snacks. All of that, along with our electronics (heaven forbid that we go anywhere without the laptop, three cameras, two palm pilots and all their accompanying cords, memory sticks, and batteries) determined the bags that were carried onto the plane. Hannah’s diaper bag gave easy access to the treats, diapers, and clothes. The laptop bag held the books, cords and disks. The camera bag held cameras. And my backpack had the toiletries, extra clothes and breast pump. Yes, breast pump. We were trying to get Hannah to take a bottle in preparation for my going back to work. We figured that I ought to be pumping during the times that she wasn’t actively eating, and there was going to be a good long stretch of time on the plane when she would probably just sleep. It worked. Once.
Everything else went into the big duffle bag that Jon backpacked across Europe with, including an extra case of diapers, wipes, clothes, shoes, laundry bags, Jon’s tripod, and all. I got all of it to fit! ALL OF IT! Still, the reigning Master Packer! We were down to one item to check at the terminal, Hannah’s car seat got checked at the gate (even if they lost our big bag, we’d be covered with clothes and such with our carry-ons, but we needed that car seat if we wanted to take her anywhere outside of the airport so we wanted it close, even if it wasn’t in the overhead compartment) and our carry-ons, and we were good to go. My mom, bless her heart, came to get us and dropped us at the curb. She wanted the very last goodbye to little Hannah. She’s extremely smitten with her, which is adorable. We got there just behind Jon’s brother who was flying with his wife and three kids. Now THERE was some luggage! Luckily, the two older kids were big enough to drag their own suitcases around, so the parents had a little less to worry about there, but the kids were all still so young that as a family they had to check THREE car seats, and two strollers, along with all their extra luggage. I was quite happy to still be a small family of three and not five at that moment.
The security gate manned by TSA was QUITE the experience with all of that baggage. Not only did we have to pull all electronics out of their bags or at least open the bags so that they could be seen easily, but we had to take off belts and shoes, jackets and phones. THEN we had to pull a sleeping Hannah out of her car seat so that it could be taken apart and scanned. Jon and I were actually pretty quick with it, but I’m still so sorry to anyone waiting in line behind us in combination with Jon’s brother doing security at the same time. We ran into the parents and sister Kim while we were at it, so most of the Woodbury’s walked through together. It was nice to have Grandma Cham there too to hold babies after she’d got her own shoes back on. I did realize though that I really could have gotten away with something there. The TSA agent did ask me if I had any liquids or gels to declare, and I mentioned Hannah’s Desitin. Diaper rash creme. I knew the tube was large, but as a product it’s not hard to find and isn’t that expensive, so I knew I could replace it if they refused to let it through. I’d just forgotten to shift that one thing into the big bag we’d checked. The guy just nodded and through went the bag. I checked afterwards, and the full tube was still there, as was a bottle of powder and a medicine dropper that I’d also neglected to mention. Hmm. Apparently, they’re not as strict with babies as they are with adults. Next, I had to step through the puffers and the metal detectors, but the guard said that Hannah didn’t have to do it with me. I could hand her around to her daddy and then go through the gates alone. Very kind of them, but I could have stuffed that kid’s diaper full of who knows what?! Don’t get me wrong, I’m quite happy to have been the one that they were lax with because it made my travel much quicker and easier, but it makes me wonder if any terrorists are so dedicated as to sneak things through using children. Scary, but a possible future issue. Next time you fly, keep your eyes on any shifty looking toddlers! Some of them have funny walks already, but look for obvious limping or bow-legged-ness.
The flight itself was awesome! The plane was only about half booked, so we had plenty of seats around us to spread out. I had heard that babies have a hard time flying under a certain age because they can’t pop their own ears as the pressure changes. That’s why they cry, so have a little sympathy next time you hear a scream in the air. However, I was also told that if they’re eating while you take off or land, then the natural effect of swallowing would be that their ears pop. Hmm. In my almost obsessive compulsive desire to keep things pleasant for everyone, I had everything ready to go at the first sign of discomfort from Hannah. Jon was holding the blanket draped across my seat, one breast was bared and my arm was crooked at the ready to feed a crying child. The engines started, we taxied down the runway, the air was piped in and then our wheels were off the ground. Ten minutes later after we’d hit cruising altitudes, I put my breast back in the bra and pulled down the drapery. She’d slept through the entire thing and showed no signs of even moving much less unconscious discomfort. What a kid! The layover in L.A. wasn’t the best, just because she refused to take the bottle and screamed until I took her back and fed her myself, but it was entertaining to hang out with the family while we waited for the next leg of the trip. Soon enough we were back in a plane with a boob bared. Nope. She slept through it all again. In fact, she slept through almost all of the actual air time. What a trooper! I fed her once while we were in the air, but then I spread out my jacket on the seat next to me and let her sprawl out and snooze on the jacket. At the end, I was sort of annoyed at the attendant who told me that I had to hold her during landing, which meant picking her up and potentially waking her…but she took that in stride too and fell back asleep on my shoulder. Best Baby Ever!!!
Once we made it to Waikiki, the drama began. She was snapped into her car seat while we organized ourselves and picked up bags because we figured that it was a quick trip to the car rental and then we’d be driving after that. She’d need to be in her seat. She didn’t enjoy that, but we thought it would be a short-lived tantrum. Nope. The men of the family all debated who would go get the cars, how we would distribute the people and bags, as well as where the house was that we’d rented for the trip. I started to get annoyed. My daughter is sitting here crying, when a little movement in a car would shut her right up. Could one of you talk while you walk and just pick up the car!? It was finally decided that there was just too much luggage for all of us to walk to the rental counter, so all the women put the bags in one big pile and took a seat right in front of the door to wait while most of the men went for transportation. The waiting got longer and longer and Hannah was still crying and hungry. I finally said that I was going to go change her diaper and feed her. Turns out that the rental desk had closed for the night before we’d arrived, so there was quite the run-around to get our vans. Leaving the women with the bags was a good decision! I had changed Hannah and was just tucking my shirt back in when mom poked her head into the bathroom to say that we were finally ready to go. On my way! Hannah was much better after that and although she didn’t enjoy being strapped into her seat AGAIN, she fell asleep pretty quickly once we were on the road. A full tummy and a clean bum can go a long way!
The one odd thing for me was to see Jon get pissy and annoyed. He was so tired…he’d been sick over the weekend and hadn’t slept much…and a lot of together time with his dad and brothers can sometimes wear on his nerves too. They all just have such different ways of communicating, so, as much of an effort as Jon makes to be patient; and as understanding as he is that his way is not the only way, he sometimes cracks under pressure too. Ahh…gotta love the human man. We’d brought my palm pilot because it had a GPS unit on it with street maps of Hawaii. Navman is the program, and NAVMAN!! Is how we refer to ‘him’. The male voice on the unit is bland and digitized, but he always gets us there, ALWAYS, so he’s sort of become our personal Saint or Superhero. I’m usually the liason to Navman, but since I was in the bathroom nursing, Jon had been trying to load our gear himself while attempting to get a map put into the program for directions all at the same time. It didn’t work. He also tried to get us triangulated before the cars pulled away on directions from the desk clerk at the rental place, but that didn’t happen either. The satellites finally found us, even in transit, and the address came right up on the program and the directions started coming loud and clear. Jon would repeat the instructions for anyone listening, but by that time we’d already been turned around once and Scot was more clear of his way. No one thought they needed directions anymore. Sadly, we were not the front car in our caravan, or even in the front of the car we were in, so no one seemed to be listening even when Navman found a shortcut. Well, even if they did listen, they didn’t know the history and power of NAVMAN, so I couldn’t blame them for not trusting his directions just yet. In his tired state, Jon got huffier than usual, so I actually had to tell him to let it go a couple of times. These unschooled ones would learn the joy that comes with the amazing abilities of GPS, but they’re tired and jet-lagged too. Tomorrow. We’ll begin the conversions tomorrow. He did let it go…sort of…well…at least he settled back into his seat and pouted inwardly. Good enough for now.
We did finally make it to our house and we walked in at midnight Hawaii time. The owner was there to greet us and gave us the tour and then she left to let us settle in. What a phenomenal place! The house is fairly unassuming from the front. The garage sticks out to the street, and most of the rest of the place is hidden by trees. The single-story ranch style was also dwarfed by the big two-story next door, so I have to admit that we weren’t expecting much at first glance. Appearances are deceiving…books by their covers, and all that. We entered through the two car garage through a tiled mud room. The mud room had the washer and dryer as well as an ironing board and iron all ready for use. A small ½ bath sat next to that, and through the second door we entered the kitchen and den area. The whole thing was open for the entire depth of the house, and the den had a couple of futon’s, a desk and a coffee table. The kitchen had a full wrap-around area giving huge amounts of counter space as well as an entire wall of cupboards around a built-in desk area. From the den we walked left past the front door into the living room which was lovely and large with vaulted ceilings. Down the hall to the other side of the house and there was the master suite. A large bedroom with two closets and the biggest bathroom with a jetted tub and separate shower. Man! Another left down the cross-wise hall led to the other 3/4 bath and three smaller bedrooms! Man! Fully stocked. But that wasn’t the end. All along the back of the house ran a lanai! A lovely tiled room with a couch, two tables, and extra chairs with two sliding doors out to the back yard. The lanai was also walled in entirely with glass plantation shutters! If everything was closed you could sit on the couch or at one of the tables and look out on the view, but you could also open the shutters and let in the island breeze! What a house! The back yard also sported a good sized in-ground pool, coconut trees, and a dock to the lake we were on. HOLY COW! Talk about paradise! I’d been to Waikiki before, but this was really BEING there! A hotel and a beach are one thing, but a home on the lake was amazing!
Once the wonder of the place had started to sink in, the debate over rooms began. There were six family units and only four bedrooms. Granted, one of the bedrooms had two beds in it and was originally supposed to be the room that we would share with Kim. However, that left Scot, Kirsten, and their kids out on the futon’s and couches. I’m sure they were willing to do that, but we all realized pretty quickly that the grown-ups would probably want access to the common areas after little ones were in bed, and how was that going to happen if the kids were sleeping on the couches? While we wandered through the house, an idea was hatched, and everyone agreed. Jon and I were happy to sleep on the futon’s in the den with Hannah next to us. That put us furthest away from the rest of the sleepers anyway, so that if she cried a lot in the night we would disturb less. Kim decided to sleep on the couch on the lanai, and that left the room with two beds in it for Scooter, Kirsty, and the kids. Problem solved. Kim slept in one room for the first night because Dave & Jessica weren’t flying in until the next day, and Jon was so enamored of the lanai that we spent the first night out there. There was a fold-out mattress in the closet, so we threw that down on the tiles, laid Hannah out on the couch, and snoozed with the Hawaiian breeze blowing.
Unfortunately, Hannah didn’t do well with the breeze after all, and her crying was right outside the bedroom of the parents, so the first night was our only night on the lanai. Jon loved it, but was considerate enough of my sleep and Hannah’s to move the family to the futon’s in the den. Well…the family slept on the futon’s on the third night. The second night found me passed out on one futon and Hannah on the other, so daddy fell asleep in the living room while Kim was on the couch on the lanai. What a house with bodies lying everywhere! I did wake up in the night that second evening to feed Hannah, and while I was up I faced to futon’s together, took the fold-out mattress and laid it across the futon’s for a full bed. It fit perfectly and provided some extra padding and coverage. I found a sheet in the cupboard and a bedspread, and then the THIRD night we were all well arranged. I even took a cushion off the couch and Hannah had her own little bed lying on the floor next to ours…until she somehow rolled. I heard a little ‘thunk’ in the night and a scream and was off the futon in a shot! I turned around to look at Hannah to try and figure out why she was crying, but there was no Hannah on her cushion! It freaked me out for a second until she screamed again and I realized that she’d rolled off her cushion, right under the futon, onto the cold tile floor. POOR BABY!!! I kicked the cushion out of the way and grabbed her up into my arms. Oh, it scared me, and I know it scared her. She screamed and screamed as I bounced her and held her and tried to calm her down. Sorry to the family for the disruption in their sleep that night, and I was fully aware of how poor of a mother I felt at that moment for not foreseeing such a thing even though she was only four inches off the floor and was supposed to be immobile for a while yet. Hannah calmed down after a few more minutes, but then she slept in her car seat for the rest of the trip!
And, the rest of the trip was much less eventful….at least as the mother in me sees things. We stopped at the beach for a short time in Waikiki, went shopping in the International Market, and had too long of a day at the temple and then the Polynesian Cultural Center. Actually, the PCC was tough. The whole family were walking along trying to find a spot to view the parade of boats that comes through. Jon had stopped to take a picture, but I didn’t think he’d stopped for long and so I followed the crowd. We wound around behind one building and then found seats on the bank in full view of the river where the boats would come by loaded with dancers and rowers. Hannah was exhausted at that point. Bored and annoyed at the carrier I had her in. I skipped the seated area and walked around on the sidewalk and kept watching for Jon, but couldn’t see him anywhere. At some point I heard one of our group ask where Jon and Lori were, but I have to admit it was quite a while before we were missed. Hmm. The small patch of sidewalk that I kept pacing finally got as boring for me as it had been for Hannah, so we wandered back a little way towards the entrance, and I finally found Jon. He’d hooked up with his brother Cleadus and his wife, and he looked really annoyed. I was tired and sad that Jon was still letting things get to him, so I didn’t really try to soften things much, just told them to follow me if they wanted to join the rest of the family. They did follow, and everyone took seats, but Hannah was still struggling, so I walked some more behind the show while Jon took lots more pictures.
Once that was over, the family sort of came together in their decision to take a boat ride through the center of the park, and then split at the other end hitting the individual sites they wanted to see most. Then we’d all meet up at the luau that night. Sounds good. Cleadus and Lisa had already taken the boat ride, so they pushed Lucy in her stroller up to the other dock while the rest of us floated and enjoyed. At the end, Hannah was having a tough time again, and it was time to feed her, but finding a private spot wasn’t working, and as I’ve already said, I wasn’t a master yet at the cover-and-feed. Who knew it took practice?! Jon was helpful by holding the drape out again so that I could be covered, but could still see Hannah and plug her up if she lost the latch, but she kept sucking too fast so that she gagged, would get pissed off at being gagged, and would cry harder because she was pissed. The boob would silence her for a minute, but then she’d drown and cry again. SO frustrating! I know she was hot and tired and it had been a long day already and there was way too much light and activity in that place so that she was on overload and couldn’t take it. We were both on edge at that point. When she’d finally had enough to at least calm her down, we moved on to the movie theater with the parents. Pa wanted to watch the Imax, and Jon figured that a cooler darker place would be better for Hannah. Good idea.
She was pretty good for a little while, but trying to feed her in the dark didn’t work when she started to fuss, so I walked around the perimeter of the room. I could tell that her outbursts were starting to annoy other movie-goers though, so I finally took one of the side doors and sat out in a quiet little hallway on the stairs and risked a chance to feed Hannah without all the draping drama. That worked wonders! She ate and passed out. Whew! I reached for the handle to go back in and sit down, but then slapped my head when the door wouldn’t open. Duh! They don’t let you sneak in the back door! Of COURSE they’re locked. I waited there until the show ended, and then joined Jon and the parents on the way out.
We followed a crowd headed to our luau and had our picture taken with some of the kids that work there and got some lovely orchid lei’s. Jon found a couple of tables together for seating the whole family and the parents saved the spot. Hannah was still asleep, so I was happy to just hold her and hang out at the entrance and wait for the other family members as they arrived so I could show them where to sit. After everybody arrived, Kirsten was sweet enough to let me put Hannah down in their stroller to sleep while I ate. Of course, Hannah didn’t stay asleep, and all the noise and activity didn’t help her already tired attitude, so I wanted to take her out and sit quietly in the car. I’d seen the show before and I was done eating so I didn’t mind taking care of my girl, but Jon told me to stay where I was. At that point it was a little too much, and being told that Grandma would take care of my crying baby when she could have been sitting next to her husband at his birthday dinner made me cry too. Jon was justified in wanting me to participate…it was my vacation too…but I felt like I’d waited so long to have this little girl and everyone else there had chosen to be childless for the week, or had three kids of their own to deal with, so I wanted to handle Hannah’s outbursts myself and not bother anyone else. I’m her mom and I’m okay with that. I was hot and tired and actually thought the break in the car would be good for me too and I thought longingly of the book I’d left in my bag in the car. Dave saw me tear up and made a comment under his breath about how maybe it was my vacation too, but maybe I didn’t need people telling me how to take care of my baby either. He he he. He’s always such a co-conspirator for me! I can’t tell you how often we catch each other’s eye when something that only we find funny happens with the Woodbury’s. It was so nice to hear my thoughts come out of someone else’s mouth, but then I really did start to cry and had to stare at the stage for twenty minutes before I was calm enough to tell Jon that I was done so I’d go relieve Cham so that she could have dessert and I could feed Hannah. I went out to find them, and Cham and Jessica were sitting near the entrance just pushing the stroller back and forth a little bit. Hannah was fine.
I joined the ladies on the wall, but Jessica and Cham are SO sweet that they both noticed my teary face, put their arms around me and broke me down again. I hate it when I get tired and can’t control my eyes! I am so grateful for such a loving and wonderful family, but sometimes I just want to be ignored too. I’m not as good at dealing with emotional things in the heat of the moment as some people, and half the time my tears aren’t really a connection to the situation as much as my inability to quantify the situation…I haven’t processed it yet, but attention gets added on, so my body just decides to tear up. No! Not what I meant! Jon has learned that if I do ever break down, he can let it go till I’m ready to talk about it, but his family don’t see me break down often enough to have learned that. Oh well. I did finally get some control and Cham and Jessica went back in while I went to the bathrooms and fed Hannah in quiet. Being alone in the stall let me cry the rest of it out, hold my girl, and know that she was finally calm and better. Whew. So much easier to deal with things after that! I took the sarong I’d brought and tied it around me with Hannah curled up inside it. It worked so well that I was able to use the facilities for their intended purpose without having to put her down on the dirty floor or hold her in one arm while trying to hike up my jeans with one hand. Whew. I got back to the luau just as people started to exit, so I hung out at the entrance and greeted everyone with a smile. We went over to the evening show of dancers and fire-walkers and had a blast while Jon shot a bunch more pictures. Some of them were amazing and we’ll have to send them to the advertisers at the PCC. Who knows?!…maybe we’ll get a discount on our next trip out there. Jon was so sweet too…he got me the much anticipated sherbert ice cream with fresh fruit that I’d been raving about and craving. YAY! The perfect topper to the long day. We had a pretty quiet ride home and then it was right to bed. Whew.
Everyone took things easy the day after the PCC and we all slept in and enjoyed some quiet time. Ahhh! MUCH needed! Some of the group went on hikes, and some of us went back to a flea market. Most of the week found everyone doing what they wanted to do with a little bit of coordination, but we all met up in the evenings and had dinner together if we hadn’t been together already that day. Some kids went to the Pineapple factory while Jon and I took Hannah out and went site seeing. We hit the North Shore during the week as well as Haunama Bay, and pretty much circled the island in our travels while crossing the hills into Waikiki several times. It seemed like we were almost always on the go, but we had a couple of quiet moments at home as well, and that was great too.
There was a small clash at the Pearl Harbor tour. We took the boat over to the Arizona memorial and everyone got lost in the sadness and greatness of that place. It was interesting to see the faces that people pulled while having their pictures taken there. Most Americans started out with that automatic smile that we all plaster on for the camera, but then people remembered where they were, how many dead men lay below them in the sea, and what a historical marker we were standing on, and then the smile slid away and the best they could do was stoic or serious. A couple of Asian women smiled for the camera anyway, but just in the tourist-y way, not in a creepy neiner-neiner-we-bombed-your-base sort of way. I wandered the length of the memorial, bouncing Hannah, who was starting to get hungry yet again. I stopped in the far end to read some of the names and realized that there were probably relatives on both sides of my family listed there. What a shocking piece of history, and what a beautiful memorial to those men who gave their lives. I walked out and heard the guide say that our group needed to line up for departure, so I stepped up next to some of the family in preparation to board the boat and head back to the island. I had just come from the memorial room and hadn’t seen Jon in there, so I assumed he was in line or would join us shortly. It’s a small place really, and it wasn’t as though he could have wandered off. I followed the crowd, found a seat on the ship and watched the stairs, waiting for Jon at the end of the line. Nope. Suddenly, the ropes were thrown, the engine pulsed and we were out to sea. Ugh. I’m going to hear it for this one! He’d already been upset that I’d lost him at the PCC. This was just one more straw.
Once we were back on land, I asked Cleadus for the keys to the van so that I could go out and feed Hannah and change her newly soiled diaper. If someone would just wait and make sure that Jon was on the next boat, I could go handle the baby. No can do. JON has the keys. Bah. Everyone else wandered away to see the other bits of history and listen to the tour notes on our headsets. I waited at the dock like some tragic figure. The sad wife with babe in arms waiting for her man to come home from the sea. He he he. A couple of the sailors on duty there asked if I needed anything, and then pointed me to the right dock where Jon’s boat would come in if he made it on the next launch. Thanks. I walked and bounced and tried to sooth, but Hannah was exhausted again, so there wasn’t much that would work until I had some privacy and the diaper bag. I spent the time between coos at the baby, carrying on my own internal dialog. I had run through several scenes depending on what Jon’s attitude would be as he docked. I had hoped that my being there waiting would sooth him a bit, and as long as he didn’t play martyr, we’d be totally fine. I know that he walks to his own drummer sometimes, but if you’re going to do that, you should probably be prepared to walk alone now and then and be okay with it.
The boat came into view and I finally saw that blue shirt and hat. Daddy’s coming honey! The crowd filed off the boat and Jon saw me as he got close. I smiled and said hi, but though he tried to smile, I could see that he wasn’t happy. He wanted to know why no one had come to tell him that the boat was leaving…it’s not like he was so far away that we couldn’t have found him. No, that’s true. But you’re also not five years old, and the tour guide DID announce that the boat was leaving. Jon hadn’t heard the guide, and I got up the guts to say that he hasn’t heard because he chose not to hear, and that was it. Jon snapped back that, “Yes, I heard the announcement and then chose NOT to hear it so I UN-heard it and went on about my business.” Yep…can’t carry on a discussion in that state or while I was about to cry again. I couldn’t say what I wanted to say correctly without thinking it through…That’s why I’m so much better in print than in person!…so I just asked Jon for the keys, handed him my headset from the tour and walked away. See, even the happiest of couples get frustrated with each other sometimes. I went to the van, fed and changed Hannah and then waited for the rest of the family to come back for the next part of our adventure. Luckily, though he was walking by himself, Jon did come to the cars at the set time, and he wasn’t left behind again. He’d even had the forethought to pick up a stamp from the desk that we could put into our passport book of National Parks. YAY! I’d forgotten to pack the book, so he gets points for solving the problem of getting the stamp in our book when we weren’t sure we’d be back to Hawaii any time soon.
In spite of all of the traveling and driving and activity and Chinese Fire Drills of drivers that we’d had that week, there was only one little accident, and that happened at home! Cleadus and Lisa had gone out for dinner and most of the rest of us were still up having our own dinner by the time they got back. Cleadus said later that he’d actually wondered if he’d pulled the car forward enough as he hit the garage door button, but he got his answer when the door hit the bumper of the car. Doh! That would be a no. Most doors have a safety mechanism in them that would pop them right back up again, and although it didn’t do any damage to the car, the track of the door just kept pushing and ended up denting down the garage door at the top like a bow-tie, which popped out two of the windows, shattering them on the floor. Eek! Jon was out there like a shot, and I followed to find out what had happened while everyone else stayed seated having dinner. The breaking glass was all we’d heard, so we assumed that they’d stopped at the grocery store and had dropped a bottle of pickles or something. Jon stayed in the garage to help clean up and figure out what to do. He also took his camera out and documented the whole thing. I went back to the dinner table and explained how the door had broken and out of the blue, little Ben states to the table, “It’s twue. It’s wearwy twue.” He was sure of it! He he he. We use that line all the time now and wonder how any kid can be such a strait-man at such a young age!
Jon and I got to take one of the cars ourselves a couple of times, which was really good. On the first trip we went to take some sunset pictures of a pagoda we’d seen. On the way back, Jon sort of snapped at another comment I made, and that started the tears. Okay…time to talk. We were calm and just driving around this beautiful island in the dark on our way back to the house before dealing with dinner plans, so we had privacy and time for a good discussion. I hadn’t waited long enough between the catalyst and the discussion itself to be able to talk without crying, but Jon was obviously frustrated, and we did talk about all the things that we needed to. All my freak out thoughts about going back to work and the fear of how Hannah would deal with it all when she was such a momma’s girl that wouldn’t take a bottle consistently. Jon felt that I was taking too much on myself and I needed to let other people help so that Hannah could LEARN not to be a momma’s girl. He felt like I needed to sit back and let her cry while other people tried to calm her down so that she could realize that mommy isn’t the only nice person that will hold her and love her. He was just so frustrated that I was always on the sides of our vacation this week, and he hated that his family were all talking about how they wished Lori could enjoy herself too. I AM enjoying myself!…I just went into this vacation with the full knowledge of what it would mean to do it with an infant along, and I accepted that! Please don’t think that I feel left out or put-upon…I’m more upset when everyone thinks I’m ‘poor Lori’ than when Hannah cries and cuts my dinner short. I love my daughter and I love taking care of her, so try not to be upset with me for being okay with less activity. I knew she wouldn’t STOP my travel plans, but I was fully aware that she would curb some activities, and I’m cool. I just hadn’t seen the point in letting her cry when I knew that I could stop her and let everyone else go back to a scream-free day. I was willing to try though. If letting her cry was what he felt would help, I could let them do that. He just had to accept that I wouldn’t enjoy it.
We also discussed how I hadn’t meant to make Jon angry earlier at Pearl Harbor, and that what I’d meant to say was that when you’re as creative and talented as he is, I understand that you become passionate and engrossed…but you have to admit, as a rational adult, that when you step into a situation with your camera you are making the decision to BECOME that engrossed…to the point that you didn’t hear the guard. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing or that I was angry at all, but you KNOW that you get distracted and that the whole family isn’t going to wait around making sure of you, so playing the martyr isn’t appropriate. Yes, you got left, but you chose to separate yourself for your art…deal with that, make the pictures great, and your family will be proud to say that they were there when you took that picture…but please don’t be angry because we didn’t all stand there waiting for you to finish. He did agree to that even though he thinks that I also wander off on my own and have never been left behind because he always makes sure that I know it’s time to leave. I know I tend to cross the street before most groups make it en masse to the cross walk, but I couldn’t remember ever being left behind, but I left it at that. I think he knows not to expect his family to wait around, but I think he expects his wife to support, which is fair, so I’ll be better about that next time.
We finally made it back to the house, and Hannah was sleeping soundly, so we went in and I did my best to hide the red eyes…it didn’t work. Lisa crossed to me as the rest of the family were chatting and trying to decide what to have for dinner. She asked if I was okay and put her arm around me…again…too soon to the situation, so I teared up…not because I was still upset, but because I hadn’t had enough time to calm back down. Lisa thought she’d set me off, but it was just the embers, really. I’m fine. She said just what others had been saying that week, “I know, it’s hard!” No, it’s not Hannah. I promise. Hannah’s fine! Jon and I just had a talk and I’m not quite composed yet is all. Lisa got a really concerned look on her face and asked if Jon and I were alright. OH! YES! We’re fine! It’s nothing like that…I just get all pent up and when it blows, it gets mis-construed. We talked all about a good many things, I got emotional…because I always get emotional…but there’s nothing to be afraid of! I promise. She gave me a hug and let it go. What a good woman! Thank you for not pressing it.
Whew! You’d think that in my 30’s I’d be better at controlling my emotions or at least at letting them out at the right times, but no…I’m still learning people!…still learning. Thanks for your patience.
Jon and I were better for the rest of that trip though. I did let others hold Hannah, even if she did cry. It was funny to realize that they’d all had crying children too…that’s why everyone had kept saying, “I know…it’s hard!” They’d held their own crying kids through the nights, so ten minutes with a crying Hannah wasn’t a drop in the bucket for them. Hmm. I was still the one to make her happy again…and a boob in the bathroom was the magic balm that always soothed her if nothing else would…but it was sweet of everyone to take turns trying to assure Hannah that there were other people in the world and that they loved her too. And, to be honest, I don’t know if that wasn’t the catalyst through the rest of the days leading up to my return to work, but she’s GREAT with other people now! She’s still adoring of mommy, and a boobie still soothes the savage babe, but she doesn’t freak and scream just because someone else holds her or feeds her. Hmm. Okay. We’re all getting better. Ahh…I’m growing.
The other times that Jon and I got to take the car out on our own was for a couple of sunrises. We drove up to a lookout not far from Haunama bay Sunday morning before church, and Jon got some gorgeous pictures of the tide on some lava rocks that had been smoothed out over hundreds of millions of years by the sea. The sun cresting the water was quite lovely too, but there’s just not that much pollution over there I guess because it was a quiet sun, not a lot of bright garish colors. Once he was done with the landscape stuff, we actually took a few minutes to set up the timer and get a family shot on the bluff with the sea behind us. YAY! We make a cute little crew! We did another sunrise morning a little further down the beach, and Jon focused on the water and sand that time. Another bunch of interesting shots. We’ll see how he plays with them and how lovely they become. I even took a few shots myself, and Jon is always so good to mention how interesting he thinks my pictures are…if only because they are things he would not have thought to shoot. We could be standing in the same location, and we will notice different things and then will photograph them differently, but we still have an appreciation of what the other has seen. He says that he even thinks that I’d make a good photographer someday if I wanted to learn the technical aspects of the camera. That’s always nice to hear. We’ll see if I give myself the time and can deal with my hubby as a teacher someday. I know he’s great, but sometimes our differences in discussion can frustrate us. I try to avoid that if I can…but photography fun might just be worth the work.
The only other highlights that I can think of are that after getting out of the pool one day and running in through the house, Jon slipped, fell, and whacked his head on the tile floor. OUCH! He was totally fine though. We joked around that with as long as his hair is getting, it was a great padding for the fall. It scared the bajeebies out of me when I heard the thunk and then he just rolled over and grabbed his brain without talking. Whew. After he shook it off and assured me that his neck was a little sore but that his head didn’t hurt at all, I was a little better. He really has been fine, too. Man!
I also took a much-anticipated trip into China Town, which was quite entertaining. It was Sunday afternoon, and there wasn’t much else planned. A few of the guys wanted to go to the Pro Bowl at the stadium, but didn’t want to deal with parking, so we set up a plan. I would drop the guys off at the stadium, take a little while in China Town, pick them up and we’d be back home in time for dinner. Dad was quite concerned with the plan because he thought any place labeled China Town couldn’t be all that reputable, and my walking through it with just myself and Hannah on my arm wasn’t safe. All I wanted to find were a pair of satin slippers to replace the pair I’d bought on my honeymoon and worn to threads, and again, it was noon on a Sunday in Hawaii. If I survived getting stuck at midnight in Grand Central Station at age 18, I think could handle this. I also had NAVMAN on hand to guide me home if I got lost. Happily, Jessica decided to come with me and we had a blast as a sister duo going on our little adventure.
We dropped the gang off at the stadium and then wandered on the freeway for a bit. Funny…I’d never asked where China Town was! I sent a text message to Jon to see if he remembered where is was since he mentioned passing it a few days earlier. In the meantime, I got off on a random exit and drove around town a little bit trying to find a drive-through for lunch. We felt like we were in sort of the industrial part of town…lots of warehouses and empty streets, when all of a sudden, things looked familiar. We were not far from Hilo Hattie’s and there was the Costco we talked about going to for chocolate covered macadamia nuts. I know where we are! There’s a Jack in the box up the street! Sure enough…there it was. I hadn’t heard anything address-wise back from Jon about China Town, so Jessica and I just decided to ask the kid in the drive through if he knew where we needed to go. He looked at me funny for a second and then said to take a right out of the drive-through and we couldn’t miss it. OH! Okay. Thanks! I took the right, saw a few Asian ladies walking along and just as I was wondering if that was too stereotypical, all of a sudden, right there on the side of the road was a huge sign saying, “Welcome to China Town!” We weren’t five blocks from the Jack in the Box. Yeehaw! Jessica said that I must really have been Japanese in a previous life or something because I’m just so drawn to the things when most other people would get lost and end up on the other side of the island. He he he. Score!
We drove through a few of the roads on an initial pass and then found a parking lot on the end of ‘town’. We grabbed our wallets, locked up the van, and took a shortcut between buildings back through the streets we’d scanned from the car. We giggled that we were walking through an alley in China Town so Pa would be horrified. He he he. We never felt a bit of fear. We skipped through half a dozen shops and across three or four blocks of stores, but never found my shoes. There were a couple of places that had the right shoe, but only in children’s sizes. There was so much fun and activity on the streets though that I was smiling even though the hunt was still on. So many people, open stores, crates of fruit and exotic vegetables laid out on the sidewalk. It was a blast! Jessica may have been a little nervous at first, but I think she enjoyed herself too and we really were only there for about half an hour all-told. The guys called to say that the game had sold out and the scalpers were selling tickets but at outrageous prices, so no one was going to the game. Doh. I told them we were on our way back to the car and we’d be there shortly. One last shop caught our eye on the way to the car and we got SO CLOSE to getting it right. She had the right shoe, but it was plain black and I wanted the red brocade. She also had the red in children’s sizes, but no one had adults. Hmm. I wandered through the clothes she had on display and loved several of her designs but couldn’t bring myself to pay so much for an outfit I’d rarely wear. I was already wearing a new pair of sparring pants that I’d just bought at the flea market and spent a good quarter on, but I’d forgotten that they had the Chinese symbol for strength on the knee. The shop owner actually asked me, “You rike-a da Kung Fu?” I felt like an idiot standing there in China town in a pair of fighting pants with Chinese writing on them when I had to say, “No…I just liked the pants.” He he he. Jessica’s asked me several times since then if I “rike-a da Kung Fu” though and we all giggle. I almost bought a pair of the little red shoes for Hannah, but thought better of it (She doesn’t wear shoes anyway) and we sped back to the car to save our husbands and Cleadus and Lisa from the boredom of the stadium gift shop.
I plugged the address into Navman and made it right to the stadium without any trouble, but in pulling past the spot where we’d left everyone before, we couldn’t see them. Jessica was on the phone with Dave and he told us that they were still walking away from the stadium to the street, so just to circle the block. Uh, okay. Unfortunately, there’s no such thing at that particular spot, so Jessica and I ended up on the freeway again, and without any turn-arounds or exits to speak of, we were twenty miles away before we finally got off. I put the address BACK into Navman, coordinated ourselves with the satellites and then got back on the freeway. This time, everyone was on the sidewalk as we pulled up. Everyone climbed in, and then we got on that same freeway on purpose this time, not wanting to get off until we were home. I did have to defend myself though…everyone was heckling me about getting lost or not knowing how to drive. Jon even ‘suggested’ that I could use Navman next time. I was sure to let EVERYONE know that I HAD used Navman, that I HAD found the Stadium, and we WERE going home without incident…it was just that THEY had told me to circle the block when there WASN’T a block to circle!!! It was the highway or no way, so it was their fault that they’d had to wait half an hour! They finally realized that I was right…and a little pissy about it too…so they stopped teasing. Still, Jessica and I shared a little bit of righteous indignation that everyone assumed that we were stupid when it had just been one wrong turn. Hey, we survived China Town, man! We rock!
All in all, it was an amazing week! There was awesome food (thanks again for Boots and Kimo’s with the macadamia nut syrup pancakes, Dave!), and beautiful days of sun and warm mists. It was a fantastic way to spend that last week before going back to being a working mom. Dave and Jessica were going to stay for a couple of days beyond our trip because they had flown in a day or two after us, so they kept the car they’d rented and the rest of us packed up the vans on Monday. Strangely, Cleadus got a phone message from Delta to let him know that his flight had been changed, so we went through quite a lot of rigamarole to figure out that our connecting flight was small…as was the direct flight…so Delta had combined the two and we were now on the red-eye direct to Salt Lake City. YAY! The other strange thing was that I got a phone call early on Monday. Bonnie sounded a little annoyed and asked where we were. Uh…sitting in our house in Hawaii…Why? She was at the airport, just sure that I’d asked her to pick us up on Monday. No! Tuesday! Och, I’m so sorry! I could have sworn I said Tuesday! She said a clipped goodbye and said she’d see us the next day and I felt so badly that she’d been sitting there all morning waiting for us. How could I have done that?! I’d emailed her our itinerary info. I’m such an idiot! I ran over to the computer and pulled up the email just to double check, and surprisingly, I’m NOT an idiot! Whew! There is was in black and white…Tuesday. I had an email from Bonnie not long after that letting me know that she’d gone back and read the email as well and couldn’t figure out where she’d gotten Monday when my email never mentioned it and clearly said Tuesday. She’s so sweet.
We finally had everything packed and made our way back to the airport. Goodbye Hawaii! The separate flights may have been thin, but combining us packed everyone in like sardines, so we were lucky to be allowed to get on the plane early because of Hannah. We stowed our gear and found our seats, but in the shuffle, Jon was four seats away from me. A very nice couple finally sat down next to me, and Jon, Scot, and Lisa were able to do a little rearranging with these two and we were all finally sitting next to our spouses, with Scot just one seat behind Kirsten and the kids. Whew. Much easier. Not long after the plane took off, they served snacks and started the movie, but the lights were low and everyone crashed. Jon was out cold, Hannah slept the whole way again with only one short break in the snoring to have a breast. I did use her blanket, but not completely covering her, which would have annoyed us both. I don’t think a soul glimpsed us though, and then we both fell right back to sleep. Ahh. Exhausting, but uneventful yet again! Best Baby Ever! Hannah did give in to crying once we’d landed and were walking towards baggage claim. I changed her and then just had to strap her into her seat so that we could go home. Whew. Bonnie was waiting outside and took us door to door, and Hannah was so tired of travel at that point that she just slept in the car and didn’t care that she was strapped in AGAIN. Once we were home, Bonnie came in for an hour to sit with Hannah and snuggle since she’d missed her Grandma time so much. Then it was nap time for the rest of us and back into a routine.
It took a couple of days to get sorted out with all the house cleaning and laundry to be done, but because I had a few more days in my maternity leave, I was able to get it together. We really were sincerely blessed in that aspect! Our biggest concerns after recovering from the trip were my going back to work, and so getting Hannah on a schedule and on a bottle…But that’s another story!
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